an era's end

so my x mother in law passed away.

now usually i don't use such terms as "passed away." that's always seemed wierd to me. usually i would just say a person died. because that's what they did, you know. but for some reason i don't feel like saying "died" or "dead" with her. i want to say "passed away." it's like the closing of an era in my life somehow.

i don't know how to explain my ex mother in law. let's just say this- she was unique. i've never known anyone else exactly like her and don't guess i ever will. i know there were a number of times in her life that i was quite upset with her. and i know a number of times she was pretty upset with me.

but you know what? with me, in the end, she was always forgiving. and she was off the wall in many ways and certainly almost never politically correct. and maybe not everyone felt that forgiveness with her. but i did.

and of course whenever i think about her, i think of her daughter, my dear sister in law who died and my feelings are all tangled up with those memories and feelings too.

and i don't know exactly what all i feel right now about the end of this era. but except for i know this- i will actually miss her. and i am sad. that she has passed away.