where am i?

well here i am, right here. in a new undisclosed location. in a new and exciting undisclosed location. with a new job, a new home, and hopefully a whole new life from here on out.

one that doesn't include having my heart ripped out of my chest and turned inside out like a sweater pulled off too fast, then thrown on the pavement and ground into pieces with the heel of a shoe.

that's never going to happen again. not in this new life. no sir.

so here i am. and while i have had some trying times setting up this new life- (for instance, right now my new tv is lost in transit and last week, between apple and verizon i lost all my contacts, my music, and my pictures) for the most part everything is quite rosy.

i have a new bike, some new furniture, a nice sweet little apartment, a job with nice people and not too much pressure.

i thought to myself today how luxurious it is to not have to write 6 emails, answer 5 phone calls, and make 8 thousand decisions before i even got in the car to drive to work. seriously, how nice is this new life where i can just get in my car (or hop on my bike) and drive/ride less than a mile to work. how nice is this life where people seem glad to see me each morning and i don't have everything i say challenged or questioned. how nice is it that people actually seem to work together and my work gets complimented regularly? and if i make a mistake, it's considered honest and not assumed to be somehow an indication of an attempt to do evil? how nice is it that people check to see if i need anything or need help with anything? and how nice is it when your new grocery store has an oenologist who seems to understand your tastes and your budget exactly? how crazy good is it that i don't have to travel further than a few blocks to buy a shower gift or a box of kleenex or a shoe rack? how perfectly awesome that my new doctor only deals with what i ask him to deal with and says not another word? how outstanding is it to hear from your old job that people are wondering "who was the idiot that let her get away?"

and so i ask myself "where am i?" because this certainly can't be life for me on this earth. it's certainly not been my life uptonow. and i'm wondering "is this heaven?"