Oh, who am I kidding?

I come from a family of overachievers. I do. They are all fabulous, wonderful people who have accomplished much in this world. They win awards and stuff. They deserve them. They deserve all the credit they get. All the accolades. They are smart, caring, compassionate, and accomplished people. They work hard. It's a good tree.

And then... There is me. I like to pretend I'm a good person. But really, who am I kidding? no, I'm not a complete derelict, but neither am I very good either. I am extraordinarly lazy. I'Ve done mean things. I've made huge mistakes. And then, I've made them again. Just because I could. I think horrible, horrible thoughts. I get angry. I get jealous. I whine, sometimes. and really, if I could think of ways to not get caught, I'd exact vengeance on people sometimes.

I'm not vegan or even vegetarian. Why? Because I like a good cheeseburger. To this day, I'd smoke a pack of cigarettes a day if you let me. Maybe two. I cannot handle liquor. But I drink anyway. Because I like to. I don't do drugs, but only because I just don't care to.

If you let me, I'd sleep everyday Til noon. And never get out of my sweats. I'd never exercise and I'd eat beef jerky for lunch. daily. There really is no end to my mean and slothful tendencies. I have no ambitions. To be anything.

I would eat spoonfuls of salt if it were socially acceptable.

I don't worry about the rain forests or the oceans. I don't give money to keep dogs from being eaten. Although I think about it once in awhile because I've known some good dogs. But beyond signing petitions, i don't act.

I don't go to church anymore at all, except with my mother. I love my mother, but i don't feel comfortable around her. Probably because she's a good person and I'm not.

I'm just not. I won't try to kid you anymore.