canine conversation

so i'm sitting here with the dog. he's sitting beside me sleeping and he's having a dream of some sort. he's shaking and he's moving his legs like he's trying to run while lying on his side and he's licking his chops and i don't know what all else.

but isn't it a mystery that dog's dream? really? what do they dream about? and why do they dream? i've heard people say that people dream to help them work out issues and problems and such, but seriously, what problems can a dog possibly have?

now if you must know- i'm not a dog lover really. (or any kind of animal lover really) but that is not to say that there haven't been dogs in my life that i've been quite fond of. because they do in fact seem to have unique personalities and temperaments. but then you gotta wonder why that is? what purpose does a dog having a personality have?

seriously, it's late at night and i'm sitting here beside a dog and i'm wondering "what the hell is it exactly with dogs?" really? "what's the purpose of a dog?"

i think what i'd really like is if dogs could talk. i'd like to have a conversation with a dog.

"hello dog, how was your day?"

"my day was great, i watched out the window for awhile, i chased a bug, i gnawed on a milkbone, i had some kibble. i slept in a puddle of sunshine. and you? how was your day?"

"well my day kinda sucked. the job's a bitch and my boss is mean. and i didn't get that report done because this lady came in and took up all my time. and it's cold out and i broke the heel on my shoe. and i dumped out the contents of my purse."

"aw, that's too bad, you want to rub me behind the ears a bit? that always seems to calm you down."

"no, i do not. let me get a glass of wine and then how about you tell me a story?"

"ok, i'll tell you about my dream last night. that's a great story."