ah. nothing.

i had plans to go out tonight. actually, i had plans to go out tomorrow night, but i overbooked myself. so i switched one of my plans to tonight. and then suddenly this afternoon i got a text and the person i was supposed to hang out with told me she was not feeling well. and you know what i felt? relieved! to have an evening to myself to do ... nothing.

i was relieved. i've worked every night this week and will be busy all weekend and have to work 3 or 4 nights next week. and quite frankly, that's too much for me.

i read somewhere that the major difference between an introverted person and an extroverted person is that an extrovert is energized by social contact while an introvert is drained by social contacts. and they need alone time to recharge.

i never read anything more true. because while i do sincerely like (some) people, and for the most part, i like being busy, being around people too much wears me the heck out. and i tend to prefer being with people who do not demand that i am "on"- they just let me be. my best friends

it's ironic that i was a teacher. because teachers pretty much have to be "on" from the moment they arrive at work until the last kid and staff member goes home. it was exhausting to me, even while i enjoyed it. i liked it best when i could facilitate rather than "perform." facilitating- "hey, what happens when you....?" than when i had to "teach" or "perform" or be "on."

according to my personality survey. i am an intj type personality. the i stands for the introvert. very few women are intj's. something like .03 or .02 of us. and the personality profiles say while we tend to be like architects; we can be leaders, but we tend to be quite happy to let other people run the show, until we realize that if we let them, things will get screwed up. and yeah. that's definitely me.

anyway. yeah tonight! nothing. and little i me can soak up energy to be ready to be social this weekend. ah. nothing.