well, she was an american girl...

raised on promises....

as opposed to what tom petty sings, sometimes it's not a great big world, it's a rather small one.

so i found myself without plans for the big american holiday here and i called up a fellow "ex-pat" from my hometown and asked her if she was busy. she answered "no, let's do something."

so we went downtown and had dinner and afterwards went to the restaurant's ajoining beer garden to sample some live music. and i should note that this fellow ex-pat was besties with one of the new besties of one of my besties from work. but she also is the sister of a girl that my brother took to the high school prom back in the day.

small creepy world. but it get's even sadder. just before we were going out, i get a text from her hometown bestie telling me "i don't know if you know it or not, but it is exactly one year to the day that xxx lost her s.o.

and yeah, i knew it was close to that anniversary, but i didn't know how exactly close. and so i was a bit trepidatious. as well as being a bit shy about that i don't really know this girl real well in the first place, even while we grew up literally within 2 blocks of each other. who the hell knew how the evening was going to go?

anyway, we met for dinner first and we got along swimmingly. found out we shared a great many things in common that we didn't know we did. we shared taht we had always both been haters of the 4th of july. and she shared with me that it was the anniversary of the death of her s.o. i just said "yeah, i was thinking that it was, you ok?"

and she says "yeah. i really think i am. i just needed to hang with someone who isn't going to make me talk about it. i am just so glad you called."

then she says "you know the last time i think i saw you?" and i asked "when?" and she says "we were at a football game and you were with that guy...."

and i thought "oh crap." and i told her "you know what? i don't want to talk about him either."

we laughed. and shoved the past away. behind our laughs.


and then, after dinner, when we went to sample the band playing outside, prelude to the fireworks, and things got really strange. the place was crowded. and on first glance we thought we were the oldest people there. but soon we found a whole section of us "old folk." and somehow we got talking to a guy named ed. who it turns out is besties with the hometown bestie of my very own brother. and seriously, he had the pictures on his cell to prove it.

so this guy is an engineer. my brother's bestie is a doctor. and my brother is a lawyer. and it's all just kinda wierd. we all talk about our jobs and where we all went to college. and how in the hell we all landed here.

and ed seems quite surprised that i had spent all of my life until the last year in the same small town. he says "really, i can't believe it. i saw the two of you walk in here and i thought to myself right away when i saw you that you must be from a big city. New York or somewhere. the way you carry yourself, your demeanor, your self confidence. i thought right away you were way out of my league. you walked in like you owned the place"

so maybe that's a line. but it's funny as hell to me. because i'm not out of anyone's league, really. i AM a country mouse. from the small town.

so after the music and the fireworks, my fellow ex-pat and i are leaving. we decided we had a good time and made plans to get together next week. and she thanks me for making tonight a good night for her. when it could have been an awful anniversary night. and on the traffic jammed ride home, i reflected to myself, how wierdly enjoyable the evening was. to be with an old new friend. to meet a wierd guy named ed who thought i was a big city girl. it all felt so wierdly independent or something. independence dayish.

and in keeping with the america theme of the evening, i turn on the radio and there is tom petty singing "well, she was an american girl. raised on promises..."

and i thought how true that was for me and my friend. we'd both been brought up in a small little town where you are raised to believe in the promise that you'll end up happily ever after.

and then somehow you don't. but you realize you're going to be ok anyway, probably.

well, she was an american girl....