creepy me

hmmm. have you ever creeped yourself out?

so every once in awhile i have thoughts about stuff that come true. and most of the time i can explain that by the fact that when i pay attention to stuff, i can make reasonably good guesses of what will happen next.

or sometimes, i'm sure it's just a coincidence. coincidences do happen. i get that.

but ok, two weekends ago i somehow thought something out of the blue that turned out to be true. i don't want to say what it was, but it was too specific to be just a random guess. and it was nothing i could have known about.

ok. so i can't explain it, but i rather shrugged it off. because it creeped me out too much to think about it. so i shrugged it away.

until today, i stopped at a starbucks because i had a gift card and i sat down by the fireplace to enjoy my latte and there was this guy sitting there a few feet away from me. and i looked at him and thought to myself "prostate cancer."

and i think, "why the hell did that pop into my head?"

so then this other guy came in and he and the guy i'd looked at greeted each other. apparently they were old friends who had not seen each other in awhile. and they moved to the seats behind me and proceeded to ask each other about each other's lives. and i eavesdrop. and well, you guessed it- the first guy told the guy he'd had prostrate cancer.

he quickly asserted that he'd been treated and was alright. which is nice and i'm glad. but i felt the need to leave then. it just sort of creeped me out that i took one look at some stranger who looked just like any other "trying to be hip" middle ager- you know- the requisite half beard thing, the trendy clothes, scarf on the collar of his coat etc. and diagnosed him with a disease.

and i think what creeps me out most is that there are things that pop into my head just as clearly about other people from time to time that i don't want to know and/or don't want to be true and now i wonder if they are true. and i'll never know. creepy.