green beans on wheels

sometimes when my brain is on overload, i become immobile. i've become so today.

yes, i will go into work in a bit. but right up until then, the sum total of my accomplishments today will be "nada."

why am i so stuck? because i finished the book i was reading this morning. very early in the morning. like shortly after 5 o'clock early.

not that i was up all night. i wasn't. but i happened to wake up this morning just before 5, and i was so close to the end and i had the time and i was awake, so i finished it.

and there are so many thoughts whirling around in my head because of it, i guess in order to keep from spinning completely out of control, the rest of my body just slowed down to a standstill. all the errands and duties i had in mind to accomplish today went out the window. i'm vegetative.

so ok. i'm not exactly completely paralyzed. i am going to work soon. i have showered i have had something to eat. and i watered my plants. and i've turned on the tv. and i've read some facebook stuff and some emails.

and i've stared out the window. quite a lot. somehow that seems like doing something. and as i was staring out the window, i see a big old van with the words GREEN BEAN DELIVERY driving by.

Apparently there is an organic food delivery service here. i guess for a fee, you can have food, that is grown without pesticides and bad things, delivered right to your door.

now you know i hate green beans. they are the sole vegetable that i don't like. and they are driving by my apt. while i stand still and contemplate some mixed up and even disturbing thoughts about life. and things in life.

and it seems like a sign, somehow. that truck driving by right then. it seems like it should mean something.

but i'm not sure what. maybe it was a cosmic joke that was meant to make me laugh. maybe it means i shouldn't let my thoughts get to me too much. maybe it was meant to jar me into moving my ass away from the window.

but most likely it just means that i have some trendy yuppie neighbor who is too lazy to go to the grocery store to gather the ingredients for her vegetable smoothie.

i know from the past, that work and the enforced mobility of that, will jog me out of my immobility. i'll put away and bury the thoughts that rendered me motionless this morning. i will become engaged with concerns other than my own measly understanding of the world. what gets in motion then tends to stay in motion. it's a law. at least for awhile.

and while i get rolling again, it's interesting to note that the greenbeans and all the other vegetables will be rolling around the city as well.