spring damnit

finally, we have some spring. but as i told a friend, i'm not even happy with it. why? because, it's been such a brutal and callous winter, i expectedd to be repaid with a much more than usually delightful spring. i don't want this drizzling in kind of spring. this creep in slowly with stops and starts kind of spring. i want it full out warm and sunny with daisies blooming. i want to be sorry i bothered to even grab a light jacket when i walk out the door, kind of spring. i want unseasonably temperate days, and close to balmy evenings.

and i do realize that the reason i'm so sensitive to this slugglish spring is that i've never really had the time to even appreciate spring before. to me there used to be one big long awful conference season that lasted from mid february to the end of may when i finally wasn't too busy to lift up my face and realize that it was a summer sun that was shining and that the winter was gone. i never had the time before to even consider whether there were signs of spring or not. i simply worked with my head down to plough through it all.

but now? i can enjoy it. and damn it, i want to.

so here's a poem about spring.

waking from drunkeness on a spring day.

from Li Po

“Life in the World is but a big dream;
I will not spoil it by any labour or care.”
So saying, I was drunk all the day,
Lying helpless at the porch in front of my door.
When I woke up, I blinked at the garden-lawn;
A lonely bird was singing amid the flowers.
I asked myself, had the day been wet or fine?
The Spring wind was telling the mango-bird.
Moved by its song I soon began to sigh,
And as wine was there I filled my own cup.
Wildly singing I waited for the moon to rise;
When my song was over, all my senses had gone.